Friday, January 8, 2010

The bouncer part deux

Sooo...before everyone gets all fired up once they read this story...I should have listened to the folks that said not to go out with him again.  But technically I didn't go anywhere but still I should have cut hm loose.  I am not going to bore you with all the details, but he happened to be in my neighborhood (he didn't know where I lived before) I was bored so I invited him over to watch TV.  Here are the highlights or lowlights from the evening:
  • he's too tall for my basement.  I was quite was like he was a giant or Shrek. 
  • He and I do not watch the same shows...I did not enjoy the dirty jobs show.  
  • He did admit to having a foot he looked at my feet like they were a two piece and a biscuit.  
  • He asked if he could suck my toes...I like a science project so I went with it.  
***pause for this announcement:  I hate feet so other people loving feet creeps me out***
  •  he proceeded to suck/lick my feet for 45 minutes!!!!  After 2 minutes- I was fighting laughing cause he was so into it.  It felt like someone was licking me with the world's smallest  marble which I finally realized was his tongue ring!
  • I kept trying to end it but he apparently couldn't get enough of my feet.  By the time he was finished my toes felt like they do when you wear flip flops in the rain.  It was disgusting.   I just threw up a little in my mouth just now as I recalled the feeling. 
How did the evening end you ask?  Once I was able to tear him away from my right foot, aka the last piece of chicken on earth, he asked me if I would give him a foot job (think about it...not your hand but your foot).....That's when I asked him to leave.  Have a good night bouncer, go violate someone else's foot into gross moistness. 


On another note I signed up for crazy blind date for tomorrow or Sunday.  Will keep you posted. 

Sunday, January 3, 2010

The bouncer

So I went out with the bouncer that I met.  I wasn't all that interested but like I said I was dating everyone.  Anyhow, here are some of the highlights...
  1. he was 45 minutes late, luckily he kept calling something about traffic. 
  2. we went to Houlihan's...he said and I quote "I've never been to a place like this."  Really? Never Friday's nothing?  But hey I'm not judging.  
  3. We went to a movie that I did NOT want to go to.  He fell asleep, snored and I was forced to watch the lameness movie.  
  4. oh he has a tongue piercing...Not sure how I feel on that yet either.
  5. He's like 6'5"  and a "thickums" lol.  But hey so am I.  Well I'm not 6'5".
Overall he was a nice guy and the conversation wasn't so bad.  I think I will go out with him again.  One thing that was super weird, today he asked me to text him a picture of my toes.  hmmm...foot fetish perhaps?  Creepy.